Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
