i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
