i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize
