dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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