If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
