she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Just puked most of my soul out..
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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