haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Randomize
