She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
