There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
