I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
