he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
