Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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