Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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