I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize