i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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