fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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