Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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