So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Hippo gnu deer
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize