After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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