Say something about gay babies.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
