Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
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