Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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