He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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