I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Randomize
