Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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