What a fucking waste of an outfit
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Randomize
