I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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