no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
