we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
