North Korea, Best Korea!
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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