dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
we made out on top of his cat.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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