I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
