You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
