i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
