if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize