Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
