Redeem this text for a blowjob
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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