i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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