You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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