i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize