he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
