it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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