Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
