i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
