I think I died a long time ago.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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