that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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