You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
