it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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