Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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