I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
